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new moon(暮光之城-新月英文版)-第46部分

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the middle of the night—I was 
still half…asleep; maybe more than half。 I closed my eyes wearily and prayed 
for a dreamless sleep。 
That's when I heard the noise that must have wakened me in the first place。 
Something sharp scraped 
along the length of my window with a high…pitched squeal; like fingernails 
against the glass。 
 12。 INTRUDER
MY EYES FLEW WIDE OPEN WITH FRIGHT; THOUGH I WAS so exhausted and muddled that 
I 
was not yet positive whether I was awake or asleep。 
Something scratched against my window again with the same thin; high…pitched 
sound。 
Confused and clumsy with sleep; I stumbled out of my bed and to the window; 
blinking the lingering tears 
from my eyes on the way。 
A huge; dark shape wobbled erratically on the other side of the glass; 
lurching toward me like it was 
going to smash right through。 I staggered back; terrified; my throat closing 
around a scream。 
Victoria。 
She'd e for me。 
I was dead。 
Not Charlie; too! 
I choked back the building scream。 I would have to keep quiet through this。 
Somehow。 I had to keep 
Charlie from ing to investigate 
And then a familiar; husky voice called from the dark shape。 
〃Bella!〃 it hissed。 〃Ouch! Damn it; open the window! OUCH!〃 
I needed two seconds to shake off the horror before I could move; but then I 
hurried to the window and 
shoved the glass out of the way。 The clouds were dimly lit from behind; enough 
for me to make sense of 
the shapes。 
〃What are you doing?〃 I gasped。 
Jacob was clinging precariously to the top of the spruce that grew in the 
middle of Charlie's little front 
yard。 His weight had bowed the tree toward the house and he now swung—his 
legs dangling twenty feet 
above the ground—not a yard away from me。 The thin branches at the tip of the 
tree scraped against the 
side of the house again with a grating squeal。 
〃I'm trying to keep〃—he huffed; shifting his weight as the treetop bounced 
him—〃my promise!〃 
I blinked my wet blurry eyes; suddenly sure that I was dreaming。 
〃When did you ever promise to kill yourself falling out of Charlie's tree?〃 
He snorted; unamused; swinging his legs to improve his balance。 〃Get out of 
the way;〃 he ordered。 
〃What?〃 
He swung his legs again; backwards and forward; increasing his momentum。 I 
realized what he was ttying 
to do。 
〃No; Jake!〃 
But I ducked to the side; aecause it was too late。 With a grunt; he launched 
himself toward my open 
window。 
Another scream built in my throat as I waited for him to fall to his death—or 
at least maim himself against 
the wooden siding。 To my shock; he swung agilely into my room; landing on the 
balls of his feet with a 
low thud。 
We both looked to the door automatically; holding our breath; waiting to see 
if the noise had woken 
Charlie。 A short moment of silence passed; and then we heard the muffled sound 
of Charlie's snore。 
A wide grin spread slowly across Jacob's face; he seemed extremely pleased 
with himself。 It wasn't the 
grin that I knew and loved—it was a new grin; one that was a bitter mockery 
of his old sincerity; on the 
new face that belonged to Sam。 
That was a bit much for me。 
I'd cried myself to sleep over this boy。 His harsh rejection had punched a 
painful new hole in what was 
left of my chest。 He'd left a new nightmare behind him; like an infection in a 
sore—the insult after the 
injury。 And now he was here in my room; smirking at me as if none of that had 
passed。 Worse than that; 
even though his arrival had been noisy and awkward; it reminded me of when 
Edward used to sneak in 
through my window at night; and the reminder picked viciously at the unhealed 
wounds。 
All of this; coupled with the fact that I was dog…tired; did not put me in a 
friendly mood。 
〃Get out!〃 I hissed; putting as much venom into the whisper as I could。 
He blinked; his face going blank with surprise。 
〃No;〃 he protested。 〃I came to apologize。〃 
〃I don't accept!〃 
I tried to shove him back out the window—after all; if this was a dream; it 
wouldn't really hurt him。 It was 
useless; though。 I didn't budge him an inch。 I dropped my hands quickly; and 
stepped away from him。 
He wasn't wearing a shirt; though the air blowing in the window was cold 
enough to make me shiver; and 
it made me unfortable to have my hands on his bare chest。 His skin was 
burning hot; like his head 
had been the last time I'd touched him。 Like he was still sick with the fever。 
He didn't look sick。 He looked huge。 He leaned over me; so big that he blacked 
out the window; 
tongue…tied by my furious reaction。 
Suddenly; it was just more than I could handle—it felt as if all of my 
sleepless nights were crashing down 
on me en masse。 I was so brutally tired that I thought I might collapse right 
there on the floor。 I swayed 
unsteadily; and struggled to keep my eyes open。 
〃Bella?〃 Jacob whispered anxiously。 He caught my elbow as I swayed again; and 
steered me back to the 
bed。 My legs gave out when I reached the edge; and I plopped into a limp heap 
on the mattress。 
〃Hey; are you okay?〃 Jacob asked; worry creasing his forehead。 
I looked up at him; the tears not yet dried on my cheeks。 〃Why in the world 
would I be okay; Jacob?〃 
Anguish replaced some of the bitterness in his face。 〃Right;〃 he agreed; and 
took a deep breath。 〃Crap。 
Well I—I'm so sorry; Bella。〃 The apology was sincere; no doubt about it; 
though there was still an 
angry twist to his features。 
〃Why did you e here? I don't want apologies from you; Jake。〃 
〃I know;〃 he whispered。 〃But I couldn't leave things the way I did this 
afternoon。 Thar was horrible。 I'm 
sorry。〃 
I shook my head wearily。 〃I don't understand anything。〃 
〃I know。 I want to explain—〃 He broke off suddenly; his mouth open; almost 
like something had cut off 
his air。 Then he sucked in a deep breath。 〃But I can't explain;〃 he said; 
still angry。 〃I wish I could。〃 
I let my head fall into my hands。 My question came out muffled by my arm。 
〃Why?〃 
He was quiet for a moment。 I twisted my head to the side—too tired to hold it 
up—to see his expression。 
It surprised me。 His eyes were squinted; his teeth clenched; his forehead 
wrinkled in effort。 
〃What's wrong?〃 I asked。 
He exhaled heavily; and I realized he'd been holding his breath; too。 〃I can't 
do it;〃 he muttered; 
frustrated。 
〃Do what?〃 
He ignored my question。 〃Look; Bella; haven't you ever had a secret that you 
couldn't tell anyone?〃 
He looked at me with knowing eyes; and my thoughts jumped immediately to the 
Cullens。 I hoped my 
expression didn't look guilty。 
〃Something you felt like you had to keep from Charlie; from your mom ?〃 he 
pressed。 〃Something you 
won't even talk about with me? Not even now?〃 
I felt my eyes tighten。 I didn't answer his question; though I knew he would 
take that as a confirmation。 
〃Can you understand that I might have the same kind of situation?〃 He was 
struggling again; seeming to 
fight for the right words。 〃Sometimes; loyalty gets in the way of what you 
want to do。 Sometimes; it's not 
your secret to tell。〃 
So; I couldn't argue with that。 He was exactly right—I had a secret that 
wasn't mine to tell; yet a secret I 
felt bound to protect。 A secret that; suddenly; he seemed to know all about。 
I still didn't see how it applied to him; or Sam; or Billy。 What was it to 
them; now that the Cullens were 
gone? 
〃I don't know why you came here; Jacob; if you were just going to give me 
riddles instead of answers。〃 
〃I'm sorry;〃 he whispered。 〃This is so frustrating。〃 
We looked at each other for a long moment in the dark room; both our faces 
hopeless。 
〃The part that kills me;〃 he said abruptly; 〃is that you already know。 I 
already told yon everything!〃 
〃What are you talking about?〃 
He sucked in a startled breath; and then leaned toward me; his face shifting 
from hopelessness to blazing 
intensity in a second。 He stared fiercely into my eyes; and his voice was fast 
and eager。 He spoke the 
words right into my face; his breath was as hot as his skin。 
〃I think I see a way to make this work out—because you know this; Bella! I 
can't tell you; but if you 
guessed it! Tha
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