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美国处男-第20部分

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个软件工程师,习惯于刨根问底,但我从来没有想过成为一个大厨或者美食家。”)
李雁南很不耐烦地说:“Robert; you confused me before I had a chance to confuse you。 Would you please just tell me what you’re getting at?”(“罗伯特,你在我把你弄晕之前,就把我给弄晕了,你能不能爽快点?”)
罗伯特一字一顿地说:“Okay。 有,花,就说,有,比——”
李雁南哭笑不得地说:“对,有话就说,有屁就放。”
罗伯特高兴地重复一遍,又低声说:“Okay。 Did you notice that girl?”(“好吧,你是否留意到那个女孩?”)
李雁南问:“Which one?”(“哪个?”)
罗伯特说:“Over there!”(“在那边。”)
李雁南向四处张望,远处的贾晶晶看到李雁南在看她,立即很不自然的样子,埋下头。
罗伯特紧张地说:“Don’t look around! Look at me! Please!”(“别四处看,看着我!求你了!”)
李雁南疑惑地看看罗伯特。
罗伯特神秘地低语道:“The waitress over there a while back。”(“就是刚才那个女服务员。”)
李雁南问:“You mean our waitress?”(“你指的是给我们服务的那个吗?”)
罗伯特点头说:“Right。 Enigma girl!”(“对,神秘女孩!”)
“Are you kidding?”(“你在搞笑吧?”)李雁南吃惊地、下意识地又向后看。他压根就没有想到是那个丫头。
罗伯特立即又紧张地喊:“Jesus! Turn back! She’s ing!”(“天啊,转过来,她来了!”)
李雁南转过来,笑:“Onthespot investigation!”(“实地考察呀!”)
罗伯特说:“Yes! Let’s look natural。”(“是的。让我们看起来自然一些!”)
孙小纯拿着酒过来,罗伯特正襟危坐。孙小纯打开啤酒瓶子,给两人斟满,李雁南发现她很紧张,啤酒都弄洒了。随后孙小纯欠身微笑着离开了。
李雁南取笑他说:“Einstein said:‘Those who are in love are all donkeys。’I think this includes Einstein and the donkeys themselves if they fell in love。”(“爱因斯坦说过,恋爱中的人都是蠢驴。我认为这句话对爱因斯坦和蠢驴本身都不例外。”)
罗伯特自嘲道:“Yes; I’m a donkey now。”(“是的,我现在就是一头蠢驴。”)
李雁南问他:“So tell me; how did you bee a donkey?”(“那么,你告诉我,你是怎么变成一头蠢驴的?”)
罗伯特喝了一满杯酒,说:“She can’t understand even one English word; so let’s start working on the enigma girl from the beginning。”(“她一个英语词汇也不懂,就让我从头告诉你这个谜一样的女孩吧。”)
李雁南略带嘲讽地说:“I’m listening to a donkey love story; but I wish I had a real one!”(“虽然我是在听驴谈情,但我希望听到一个真正的爱情故事!”)
罗伯特认真地说:“Sure! I swear!”(“当然!我发誓!”)
李雁南皱着眉头,哭丧着脸看着罗伯特。
客人陆陆续续地步入酒楼,轻柔的音乐响起,年轻俏皮的女服务员们微笑着伫立在桌子旁边,迎宾们则将客人批发给她们,她们再把这些客人零售出去。
角落里,罗伯特充满疑惑和激情地讲述着自己的伤心事:“…I can’t understand why she keeps refusing me。 She refused my payment; my tip; my invitation and my gifts。 She refused everything I offered despite the fact that I think she deserves them。 You know; many strange girls on the street talked to me and asked to exchange numbers even if we only talked for a few seconds。 And they almost always called me shortly thereafter and visited me in my apartment without invitation。 They didn’t go home until night even if I implied they should leave or plained directly。 Some of them stayed overnight on my couch; some of them declared me their boyfriend even though we had only met once。 Jesus! I’ve never experienced such a situation in America。 But this girl is quite different。 She’s so introverted and reserved。 It’s evident that she isn’t arrogant because she always seems embarrassed or scared and runs away whenever I try to approach her。 They’re all Chinese girls but they’re so different。 Why?”(“……我不明白为什么她总是拒绝我,她拒绝了我的酬谢,我的小费,我的邀请,还有我的礼物。她拒绝了我的一切,尽管我认为这是她应得的。你知道大街上很多陌生的女孩总是主动和我搭话,即使我们只说了几秒钟,她们也要我们互换电话号码。她们几乎都会很快给我打电话,不请自到,到我住处。即使到了深夜,我暗示也好,摆明了抱怨也好,她们就是不回家。有的在我客厅沙发上过夜,有的到处说我是她的男友,而我们才一面之交呢。天哪!我在美国都没有这样的经历!这个女孩却如此不同。她如此内向,如此矜持。很明显,这个女孩并不傲慢,因为每当我试图接近她,她总是一副窘迫、受惊的样子,马上就跑开了。她们都是中国女孩,却如此不同,为什么?”)
作为中国人,李雁南听了这些话心里五味杂陈。他本能地想乘机打击一下罗伯特,就冷静而冷血地说:“To be honest; you’re somebody for the first sort of girls because these girls pretend to be interested in you; but it's actually your country they're interested in。”(“坦率地说,在我看来,你在第一类女孩面前之所以是个人物,因为她们是‘醉翁之意不在酒’呀。”)
李雁南清楚地看见罗伯特脸上激灵了一下,他歪着脑袋思忖着李雁南的话。片刻,他又抬头等待着李雁南后面的话,他的眼里有一种悲哀感和挫折感。李雁南毫不客气地接着说:“As for the second sort; you’re nobody for the waitress because she doesn’t wish to be disturbed。”(“至于第二类,你对于那个服务员狗屁都不是,是因为她不想被打扰。”)
罗伯特一脸惊讶和真诚的样子说:“Why? I won’t bother her; I just want to municate and bee friends with her。”(“为什么?我不会打扰她,我想和她交流,和她交朋友。”)
李雁南揶揄道:“Do you mean a software engineer from America municates with a Chinese waitress from the countryside? It’s ridiculous!”(“你的意思是说,一个来自美国的软件工程师和一个来自中国农村的女服务员交流,做朋友? 太可笑了!”)
孙小纯站在旁边为他们添酒。李雁南看了她一眼,她不太自然地笑了笑。
罗伯特紧张地对李雁南说:“Look at me! Please!”(“请看着我!”)
李雁南笑着摇头道:“You’re not only a donkey but also a coward。”(“你不但是蠢驴还是胆小鬼!”)
罗伯特说:“I’ll let you know what I am but tell me why we can’t bee friends。 Please!”(“我将会让你知道我是什么,但现在请告诉我,为什么我们不能做朋友。”)
李雁南指了一下杯子,罗伯特赶紧为他添满。
李雁南喝了一口,说:“I think you might as well be from Mars as far as she’s concerned; you know what I mean?”(“我认为对于她而言,你就像火星人那么遥远,你明白我的意思吗?”)
罗伯特笑:“Really? Why?”(“是吗?为什么?”)
李雁南说:“Well; you’re a mystery for her just like she’s an enigma for you。”(“对于她而言,你也是个谜,就像她对于你一样。”)
罗伯特承认后又抱怨:“Yes; we’re mysterious to each other but she shows no interest in me at all。”(“是的,我们相互都是谜,但她对我却一点也不感兴趣。”)
李雁南说:“Because she never expects much to e of it。 She won’t waste her time even if you’re willing to waste yours。 So; let her go; please!”(“因为她从来没有对自己寄望太高——尽管你愿意浪费你的时间,她却不想浪费时间。所以,你放过她吧,我求你了!”)
罗伯特不满地说:“Why do you insist I’m wasting time?Why should I give up? I’m not a coward。 You know we Americans always say‘I failed but at least I tried。’I think it’s worth a shot at least。”(“你怎么就认定我是在浪费时间呢?为什么我要放弃,我可不是孬种!你知道我们美国人有句口头禅,就是‘尽管我失败了,但我尽力了。’我觉得至少值得一试。”)
李雁南淡淡地说:“But this is China; not America。”(“但这里是中国,不是美国。”)
罗伯特问:“Why?”(“为什么?”)
李雁南说:“Ok; since you told me an American saying; I'd like to tell you a famous Chinese proverb。 It's actually more of a rule in Chinese marriage; really: Bride and groom should be wellmatched in social; economic status and education background nowadays I might add。”(“好吧。既然你告诉了我一句美国名言,我也告诉你一句中国名言,确切地说应该是在婚姻上的一个规则,就是:新娘和新郎应该门当户对,比如,社会地位、经济地位,而今眼目下,我还得增加一个:教育背景。”)
罗伯特不屑一顾地说:“It’s absolutely absurd and silly! It’s a hierarchy; just like Indian caste system。 It’s a shame! ”(“这简直荒唐透顶,愚不可及!就像印度的种姓制度。这是个耻辱!”)
李雁南突然激动起来,连珠炮似地说:“Ok; Mr。 Robert; let me explain it to as best I can。 How well do you know her? How much have you known China’s countryside? There’re lots of country girls like her in big cities but they’re just transient occupants。 For them cities are merely places to do the inferior jobs city people refuse to do even if the money they earn is negligible pared to what the city people make。 They can rarely enjoy a meal like we’re doing now even ifthey work in the restaurant。 They pass by the theatre every day but rarely see a film with their friends because two tickets are probably as expensive as half of their salary。 They have to work hard jobs for their hospitalized parents or to put their younger sisters and brothers in school。 They’re anx
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