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I made a concerted effort to focus。 There was something I needed to say。 The most important thing。
Very carefully； so carefully that the movement was actually discernible； I brought my right arm out from
behind my back and raised my hand to touch his cheek。 I refused to let myself be sidetracked by the
pearly color of my hand or by the smooth silk of his skin or by the charge that zinged in my fingertips。
I stared into his eyes and heard my own voice for the first time。
〃I love you；〃 I said； but it sounded like singing。 My voice rang and shimmered like a bell。
His answering smile dazzled me more than it ever had when I was human； I could really see it now。
〃As I love you；〃 he told me。
He took my face between his hands and leaned his face to mine—slow enough to remind me to be
careful。 He
kissed me； soft as a whisper at first； and then suddenly stronger； fiercer。 I tried to remember to be gentle
with him； but it was hard work to remember anything in the onslaught of sensation； hard to hold on to any
coherent thoughts。
It was like he'd never kissed me—like this was our first kiss。 And； in truth； he'd never kissed me this
way before。
It almost made me feel guilty。 Surely I was in breach of the contract。 I couldn't be allowed to have this；
too。
Though I didn't need oxygen； my breathing sped； raced as fast as it had when I was burning。 This was a
different kind of fire。
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Someone cleared his throat。 Emmett。 I recognized the deep sound at once； joking and annoyed at the
same time。
I'd forgotten we weren't alone。 And then I realized that the way I was curved around Edward now was
not exactly polite for pany。
Embarrassed； I halfstepped away in another instantaneous movement。
Edward chuckled and stepped with me； keeping his arms tight around my waist。 His face was glowing
—like a white flame burned from behind his diamond skin。
I took an unnecessary breath to settle myself。
How different this kissing was！ I read his expression as I pared the indistinct human memories to this
clear； intense feeling。 He looked。。。 a little smug。
〃You've been holding out on me；〃 I accused in my singing voice； my eyes narrowing a tiny bit。
He laughed； radiant with relief that it was all over—the fear； the pain； the uncertainties； the waiting； all of
it behind us now。 〃It was sort of necessary at the time；〃 he reminded me。 〃Now it's your turn to not break
me。〃 He laughed again。
I frowned as I considered that； and then Edward was not the only one laughing。
Carlisle stepped around Emmett and walked toward me swiftly； his eyes were only slightly wary； but
Jasper shadowed his footsteps。 I'd never seen Carlisle's face before either； not really。 I had an odd urge
to blink—like I was staring at the sun。
〃How do you feel； Bella？〃 Carlisle asked。
I considered that for a sixtyfourth of a second。
〃Overwhelmed。 There's so much。 。。。〃 I trailed off； listening to the belltone of my voice again。
〃Yes； it can be quite confusing。〃
I nodded one fast； jerky bob。 〃But I feel like me。 Sort of。 I didn't expect that。〃
Edward's arms squeezed lightly around my waist。 〃I told you so；〃 he whispered。
〃You are quite controlled；〃 Carlisle mused。 〃More so than expected； even with the time you had to
prepare yourself mentally for this。〃
I thought about the wild mood swings； the difficulty concentrating； and whispered； 〃I'm not sure about
that。〃
He nodded seriously； and then his jeweled eyes glittered with interest。 〃It seems like we did something
right with the morphine this time。 Tell me； what do you remember of the transformation process？〃
I hesitated； intensely aware of Edward's breath brushing against my cheek； sending whispers of
electricity through my skin。
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〃Everything was。。。 very dim before。 I remember the baby couldn't breathe___〃
I looked at Edward； momentarily frightened by the memory。
〃Renesmee is healthy and well；〃 he promised； a gleam I'd never seen before in his eyes。 He said her
name with an understated fervor。 A reverence。 The way devout people talked about their gods。 〃What
do you remember after that？〃
I focused on my poker face。 I'd never been much of a liar。 〃It's hard to remember。 It was so dark
before。 And then。。。 I opened my eyes and I could see everything〃
〃Amazing；〃 Carlisle breathed； his eyes alight。
Chagrin washed through me； and I waited for the heat to burn in my cheeks and give me away。 And then
I remembered that I would never blush again。 Maybe that would protect Edward from the truth。
I'd have to find a way to tip off Carlisle； though。 Someday。 If he ever needed to create another vampire。
That possibility seemed very unlikely； which made me feel better about lying。
〃I want you to think—to tell me everything you remember；〃 Carlisle pressed excitedly； and I couldn't
help the grimace that flashed across my face。 I didn't want to have to keep lying； because I might slip up。
And I didn't want to think about the burning。 Unlike the human memories； that part was perfectly clear
and I found I could remember it with far too much precision。
〃Oh； I'm so sorry； Bella；〃 Carlisle apologized immediately。 〃Of course your thirst must be very
unfortable。 This conversation can wait。〃
Until he'd mentioned it； the thirst actually wasn't unmanageable。 There was so much room in my head。 A
separate part of my brain was keeping tabs on the burn in my throat； almost like a reflex。 The way my old
brain had handled breathing and blinking。
But Carlisle's assumption brought the burn to the forefront of my mind。 Suddenly； the dry ache was all I
could think about； and the more I thought about it； the more it hurt。 My hand flew up to cup my throat；
like I could smother the flames from the outside。 The skin of my neck was strange beneath my fingers。 So
smooth it was somehow soft； though it was hard as stone； too。
Edward dropped his arms and took my other hand； tugging gently。 〃Let's hunt； Bella。〃
My eyes opened wider and the pain of the thirst receded； shock taking its place。
Me？ Hunt？ With Edward？ But。。。 how？ I didn't know what to do。
He read the alarm in my expression and smiled encouragingly。 〃It's quite easy； love。 Instinctual。 Don't
worry； I'll show you。〃 When I didn't move； he grinned his crooked smile and raised his eyebrows。 〃I was
under the impression that you'd always wanted to see me hunt。〃
I laughed in a short burst of humor （part of me listened in wonder to the pealing bell sound） as his words
reminded me of cloudy human conversations。 And then I took a whole second to run quickly through
those first days
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with Edward—the true beginning of my life—in my head so that I would never forget them。 I did not
expect that it would be so unfortable to remember。 Like trying to squint through muddy water。 I
knew from Rosalie's experience that if I thought of my human memories enough； I would not lose them
over time。 I did not want to forget one minute I'd spent with Edward； even now； when eternity stretched
in front of us。 i would have to make sure those human memories were cemented into my infallible vampire
mind。
〃Shall we？〃 Edward asked。 He reached up to take the hand that was still at my neck。 His fingers
smoothed down the column of my throat。 〃I don't want you to be hurting；〃 he added in a low murmur。
Something I would not have been able to hear before。
Tm fine；〃 I said out of lingering human habit。 〃Wait。 First。〃
There was so much。 I'd never gotten to my questions。 There were more important things than the ache。
It was Carlisle who spoke now。 〃Yes？〃
〃I want to see her。 Renesmee。〃
It was oddly difficult to say her name。 My daughter； these words were even harder to think。 It all
seemed so distant。 I tried to remember how I had felt three days ago； and automatically； my hands pulled
free of Edward's and d